Charisma, effortless confidence, and being self-assured can complement each other, but they can also exist independently, which is what we discussed with Happy High Status author Viv Groskop. Some people may possess natural charisma but lack self-assurance, while others may have high self-assurance without displaying overt charisma. Building these traits can lead to a more compelling and impactful presence in various aspects of life. The differences include:

Read: Are you confident? – Introduction to the How To Be Books Podcast

• Charisma: Charisma refers to a compelling and magnetic personality that attracts and influences others. Charismatic individuals have a captivating presence, charm, and the ability to inspire and persuade others. They often possess excellent communication skills and can make people feel engaged and motivated.
• Confidence: Confidence is a belief in one’s own abilities, skills, and judgments. It is a sense of self-assurance that allows individuals to face challenges, take risks, and tackle difficult situations without being overly affected by self-doubt or fear of failure.
• Self-assuredness: Being self-assured means having a strong sense of self-confidence and self-belief. It is about trusting one’s instincts and decisions, being comfortable in one’s own skin, and maintaining a steady and composed demeanor even in challenging situations.

So how can we be effortlessly confident?

Thanks to the following author for participating:

Viv Groskop is an award-winning writer, stand-up comedian, playwright and TV and radio presenter. She is the host of the podcast How To Own the Room, with over 2 million downloads and guests including Hillary and Chelsea Clinton, Margaret Atwood, Professor Mary Beard, Nigella Lawson and very occasionally a man like Brian Cox (Succession’s Logan Roy).

Her previous books include How to Own the Room: Women and the Art of Brilliant Speaking, and Lift As You Climb: Women, Ambition and How to Change the Story. As a performance coach, she works with women and senior teams in business and media, helping them to redefine leadership and authority – and generally worry less about how they come across so they can actually just do their work. We’re talking about her new book Happy High Status: How to Be Effortlessly Confident.

Other wonderful guests who took part:

UKCP Psychotherapist Mark Vahrmeyer from Brighton and Hove Psychotherapy.

Parenting teenagers expert and psychologist Angela Karanja.

Here are some of the resources from the show:

For their book, The Confidence Code, authors Katty Kay and Claire Shipman looked at research showing women lack the self-assurance they deserve in their careers – and just as important, examined what they should do about it.

Books looked at this week:

Viv Groskop: Happy High Status: How to Be Effortlessly Confident

Katty Kay and Claire Shipman: The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance – What Women Should Know

Want to watch special bonus material from this episode? Join the How To Be membership for only £3 per month!

Transcription